I’m a simple man. I like simple things. I don’t need to be wow’d by over the top visuals to make me enjoy it. I know what I like in my social activities. I don’t like to ask for much but when you are going to take me someplace to drink, please be sure that some of these items can be checked. These are my bar necessities. (more…)

Why?!

Good morning cherubs. Do you know what’s coming up in the next week or so? If guessed that pool season is coming to a close, you’re spot on. Have you been to a pool this year? Have you seen the lovely specimens that go there? If you haven’t, you’re one lucky bastard and I envy you. It’s a great place to go people watch, but be advised, it’s not like airport people-watching (the good kind).

 Here’s a few of my observations to share with you.

1.) Turns out, people have no shame. Or mirrors for that matter.

2.) Bathing suits are no longer a requirement. Apparently, bras and panties qualify as swimwear. Who knew?

3.) The pool could be mistaken as a “I’m Pregnant and in a Bikini” convention if everyone in a bikini were actually pregnant with septuplets, and didn’t just look like it.

4.) It’s worth repeating: People have no shame. WHY?! I mean, good for you that you have confidence, but on the other hand, my cornias are burning with rage and are begging my brain to relay a message to my hands that require them to take a fork and stick it in them. It’s hard to fight that urge.

I’m sure there’s a lot more things I’m leaving out, but I’m getting nauseous just writing about it. Feel free to add your own horrors in the comments.